A Hypothetical Acceptance Letter Written to USE on Behalf of Many of Americas Great Leaders

Dear U.S.U,
Hello and thank you U.S.U for taking the time to look at these fine applicants from whom I have hand picked 20 highly eligible applicants out of 40. I have also included a 7 student waiting list and 2 students who I strongly believe should be bared from entering this prestigious university. As you very well we are entering a new century the 20th century these are very exiting and changing times. You must strive to make U.S.U a leader amongst all educational facilities by not only hiring fine professors but getting the best students and that includes females. These students that I have reviewed and personally recommend show exceptional attributes in politics, social science, literature, and business. These are exactly what U.S.U has to offer these applicants, so you will not only get bright kids but ones that will take full advantage of what U.S.U has to offer. Remember it's not the faculty alone or the curriculum its how well a school adapts and changes to fit the needs of their students and the times.
…